Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Why do I have such an aversion to spending money on myself???
I have been giving it a lot of thought lately, trying to figure out why I just can't seem to spend money and why although I have no problem spending money on other people, I don't tend to spoil myself. I think it has something to do with the fact that when I did spoil myself before, I didn't know when to stop and got my self in a heap of credit card debt. All through college I let my credit cards pay for everything, I would make my minimum payments so that I never hurt my credit score, in fact, I had an amazing credit score, which led to my being able to obtain more credit. Ugh, what a mess!!! My first year out of college, I spent at least 75% of my time working. I would work a shift, the whole time, hoping and praying that someone would call in sick so that I could take their shift to earn extra money. That first year, I paid over $17,000 worth of credit card debt. Over the next couple of years I would rack up a little more debt here and there, but still I was making progress. I vowed once I finished paying off the debt, I would NEVER get into needless credit card debt again. To this day I only use my credit card for less than $100 worth of charges a month, if the balance gets higher than that, I have an anxiety attack. I try to tell myself now that it's OK to spoil myself a little and splurge every once and a while, I just can seem to do it. I think I rather enjoy seeing my balances go up and being financially free of debts that the thought of doing anything to wreck all my progress scares the crap out of me! I know, I know, I need help. Any suggestions on how I can break free from this total frugal freakness? Or am I doing OK?